My colleague Peter Reilly, CPA, is pursuing a case on which I took a pass a week ago, involving substantial compliance in a charitable deduction case (non-conservation type). It didn’t interest me sufficiently, as the appraisal was way off the mark as to specificity, however qualified the appraiser.

But I keep searching for a good story.

This morning there’s a novel frivolite, who managed to bring a grin even to my battered visage, as I await, a wee bit apprehensively, my first COVID shot this afternoon.

Here’s Dmitry Tsibulskiy, Docket No. 15660-19, filed 3/8/21 (an important date in our family for reasons other than inoculations).

IRS was wrong-footed when the numbers in the tax return and SNOD didn’t match those in the business records proffered in support, but between calendar call and recall, IRS stumped up a supplement harmonizing all.

So Judge Elizabeth A. (“Tex”) Copeland told IRS to certify the numbers, and report. But if Dmitry continued to stall with trial prep, IRS could refile its motion to dismiss for want of prosecution. So, surprise, surprise, IRS tries again to toss Dmitry.

Ya gotta admit, Dmitry’s status report is a doozy.

“The status of the petitioner is one of an ‘Internationally Protected Person’ by the proper surredner [sic] to the Occupying military forces. See attached the ‘Notice of Surrender to the Commander-nChief.’ All claims have been properly filed as required by the occuping [sic] forces. The tax Court being a military court shall address all actions to the President of the United States as the holder in due course of the PERSON named: DMITRIY TSIBULSKIY.” Order, at p. 2.

Judge Tex Copeland notes, with a straight face, “(N)o attachment was included.” Order, at p. 2.

I somehow doubt that, even if there were an attachment, Dmitry would have survived this triumph.

He’s tossed, to the tune of a hundred grand plus interest.