No, it’s not Austin Powers.

Hearken back to my blogpost “The Carousel Is Closed”, 10/10/14. There, I wondered who the mystery witness might be, the subject of a Tax Court press release announcing the lockdown of the Special Trial Session on October 24.

Well, Judge Lauber tells us, in an eleven-page designated hitter in Amazon.com, Inc. & Subsidiaries, Docket No. 31197-12, filed 10/21/14.

It’s Mr. Brian Valentine, a fact witness, whose testimony will be heard only by the chosen few, designated in lists to be prepared by the Amazonians and by IRS, which lists were due to be handed in to Judge Lauber  yesterday.  See Order, at p. 8.

Just like a client (or a Judge) to order things done yesterday. And the order doesn’t require the litigants to exchange their lists, either.

But Judge Lauber is adamant. “Persons not on the parties’ lists (or persons not otherwise affiliated with the Court) shall not be permitted in the courtroom during fact testimony at trial unless otherwise directed by the Court. Petitioner shall have the primary responsibility to assure compliance with this paragraph.” Order, at p. 9. Even if they haven’t seen IRS’s list.

I can just see Jeff Bezos standing, with flaming sword in hand, at the door of Centre Court, 400 Second Street, NW, driving away eavesdroppers and the idly curious from the sacred precincts.