George Bernard Shaw once remarked that no novel was so bad as not to be worth publishing, provided it was a novel “and not an ineptitude.” George never envisioned e-books.

Well, STJ Lewis Carluzzo, the Judge Whose Name Echoes Through These Electrons, has a similar message for Darrell E. Reed, Docket No. 19497-14, filed 5/14/15.

Only Darrell’s petition is apparently an ineptitude.

No, I’m not picking up on STJ Lew’s designated hitters and off-the-benchers solely because of our shared forename, correctly spelled. It’s just that the last few days haven’t brought anything better from the Glasshouse at 400 Second Street, NW.

Darrell’s fighting a failure-to-state-a-claim motion, which would knock out his petition. He doesn’t deny income or claim deductions other than what IRS allows. It seems Darrell isn’t even cognizably frivolous.

STJ Lew gave Darrell two shots at filing an amended petition, following Rule 34(b). Assign errors by the numbers, and state your facts showing such errors by the letters.

STJ Lew: “Although given ample opportunity to correct the defective petition, petitioner has failed to do so. In his response to respondent’s motion petitioner reminds us of our obligation to liberally construe his pleading on account of his status as a self-represented litigant. Our obligation to liberally construe the petition, however, does not require that we rewrite it. Because the petition fails to state a claim upon which relief can be granted, we will grant respondent’s motion to dismiss.” Order, at p. 2. (Citations omitted).

Takeaway- Make sure it is a petition.